Saturday 15 June 2013

Some people think we might as well not bother trying to resolve our difficulties. They figure that, when we clear up one problem, we simply create space for another. So why go to all that effort? That's like saying, 'What's the point in eating? I shall only be hungry soon'. We need struggle. It is essential to our well-being that we always have something to pit our wits against. We should be grateful for the fact that there is always something new to learn.
Season after season, folk follow the progress of their favourite sporting stars. The names and activities differ. The devotion and dedication is universal. It seems that loyalty is hard-wired into our psyche. It does not matter who we support, what matters is that we support someone - or something. A person, a team, a cause. We all need someone to cheer for (which is healthy) and something or someone to disapprove or fight against. But success, for you involves going beyond a pet hate or prejudice.
 A suspicion, no matter how strong, is never as convincing as a confession. Even when we feel sure we know the score, we still like to hear it spoken. It takes away doubt and allows self-congratulation. 'Ha,' we can say, 'I knew that already.' Maybe this is why, in the old days, sinners were urged to own up to everything for the good of their souls. Really, it was just to gratify their accuser's egos. Now, who is trying to get you to put which cards on what table? And why? Act from your heart, not from your sense of obligation. 
Daily life is starting to make huge demands on your patience, your emotional resilience and your bank account. You feel as if you are running out of the strength and energy that you need to cope with a stressful situation. And as you find out more about what's really going on in your world, you are no longer so sure about who to believe. Yet despite the uncertainty, the trouble you face is very temporary. Somehow,a wonderful, lasting change for the better will begin to come about.
 For someone with a real sense of purpose, all roads lead to the same destination. But to the person with no real desire to get anywhere in particular, even a fast car on a clear road is no guarantee of a successful journey. This is now a good time to form, maintain and confirm a clear idea about where you really want to be in your emotional or romantic life. If you establish that, you'll eventually get to your goal, even if, for the time being, your only option is to wind a very convoluted path towards it.
We live in a high-tech, turned on, networked world. We are bombarded with so much communication that we can hardly avoid knowing what's 'current and popular' even if we try to ignore everything. Yet, for all the links that potentially tie us to millions of others, there are so many ways in which we can feel alone, unhappy or as if our lives lack purpose. What makes especially joyous is its potential to help you develop a much clearer sense of direction and involvement in a situation that feels very right.
 You really cannot afford to waste time wandering down a road that leads nowhere. It doesn't matter how brightly signposted this path is. It doesn't matter whether the paving stones at the entrance are made of pure gold. If you look at what it is taking you towards, you will notice that it is not the destination you want. The street that you need may look a lot less glamorous... but it is the only route that will take you to where you need to be. The choices you make next in your emotional life may turn out to be crucial.
Some people love a good debate. Tell them the sky is blue and they'll find some way to argue that it is devoid of colour and merely gives the impression of a blue tint. If, though, you make the same claim to them, they will reply that if it looks blue, it is blue and you are merely splitting hairs. Now I am not suggesting that anyone you know has a tendency to be so contrary. Nor would I dream of implying that at times, you can be tricky yourself. But if you walk away from a row, you can walk towards a great opportunity.
 You can have change if you want change, but do you want change? You can keep the status quo (or at least most of it) if you want to, but do you want to? The big question is not, 'where is your opportunity?' It is, 'what is your motivation?' If you are uncertain, to what extent is this because you dare not confess what you truly feel? If you are sure, to what extent is this a determined effort to blot out other alternatives that you are afraid to contemplate? Resolve that and all else in your emotional life will resolve itself.
There are times when it seems as if the harder we try to do something simple, the more complicated life gets. Yet when we find the courage to tackle a convoluted matter, we suddenly see it is essentially straightforward. We shouldn't ever do something just because it's easy. Nor should we be discouraged just because something looks difficult. If something that ought to be a breeze is turning into a gale, it may be time to take shelter. But first, try letting that wind get into your sails. You could rise surprisingly high.
 A lot of people like sad songs and stories. Tales of failure bring a smile to their face. When we hear of others' misfortunes, it can make our own hardship easier to bear. One person does not now seem to share your enthusiasm for a particular idea. Perhaps, instead of trying to play up the potential advantage, you should base a proposition around the painting of a gloomier picture. You can afford to extend emotional trust now, regardless of what line you take. But be aware that someone's pessimism needs to be respected! 
A famous still from a silent movie features the great comedian Harold Lloyd, dangling from the hands of a clock, high on the roof of a building. The film is hilarious and that particular incident with the timepiece is iconic. Aren't we all, to some extent, constantly battling against the inexorable passage of time? There is only one sure way to deal with stress... and that's to relax.  As you let go of a source of concern and annoyance, you'll start to laugh at what once worried you so much. And much will then improve.
 When riding on the skateboard of life, it is always wise to wear a helmet and knee-pads. If, though, you dress from head to foot in thick protective clothes, you will compromise your own ability to balance. This, in an ironic way, will make you more likely to need the armour. This applies too, to the safety mechanism you now want to introduce to a plan or arrangement in your emotional life. Of course, you must be careful. But if you are too cautious you may end up putting obstacles in your own path. Be wary; not afraid. 


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